Eye Recommend --- Things People Say That Offend Republicans

THINGS PEOPLE SAY THAT OFFEND REPUBLICANS, by David Rackoff --
http://www.rantpolitical.com/2015/02/13/things-people-say-that-offend-all-republicans/?utm_medium=referral&utm_source=Taboola&utm_term=Title3&utm_content=rs-rawstory#slide_1

what eye thynk:  Mr. Rackoff has created a spot-on, and often very funny article.  In no particular order:

"Bush lied us into Iraq.
They get madder about us saying this than we get about Bush doing it.  It was not a misunderstanding...This was a president misleading the country into a war he already knew he wanted."

"Santa is not white.
A unicorn is not left-handed.  It's a ridiculous thing to argue.  Santa can be whatever you want him to be.  Sorry Megyn Kelly.  You are sort of a news person.  This is not news."

"We need more regulation.
Remember the Great Recession?  Well, 78% of Americans think we actually need more rules for Wall Street.  Not to mention laws protecting the environment.  It seems like a pipeline has been bursting every week lately."

"CNN isn't liberal.
Yes, MSNBC is liberal.  But CBS, CNN and most other outlets are just reporting the news.  If Rand Paul comes off like a weirdo, maybe that's on Rand Paul."

"Reagan was imperfect.
This really bothers Republicans.  But Iran Contra.  But huge deficits. But not mentioning AIDS for so long.  So just maybe cool it on the naming of everything after him."

"Enhanced interrogation techniques is a fancy phrase meaning torture.
Use whatever synonym you want, it doesn't matter what Roget's Thesaurus says, waterboarding = torture.  And it's un-American."

"You voted for Sarah Palin.
Tell yourself that you voted for John McCain, war hero, Senator, maverick.  But remember the name printed right below his? Yes, you cast a vote for Sarah freakin' Palin.  You did that.  Seriously.  I can't believe it either."

"Racist Dixiecrats are now called Republicans.
Yes, southern Democrats used to be the racist ones.  Totally.  That's on us.  We're very sorry and embarrassed.  But that powerful voting bloc didn't just disappear.  They are now called southern Republicans."

"The deficit is different from the debt.  And it's down since Obama took office.
The debt is the total amount, including from past administrations.  The deficit is the difference between what we take in and what we spend.  And it's way down.  When Obama said we've seen 'our deficits cut by two thirds,' he was correct.  And it makes Republicans nuts."

"I don't care what Clinton did with those ladies.
Yes, it's a little icky.  And not great.  And I wouldn't fix him up with one of my single friends.  But he did a damn good job as president. George W was by all accounts a devoted husband.  But not so good with the governing.  I prefer good president, bad husband."

"'Under God' was not in the Pledge for a long time.
The Pledge of Allegiance was written in 1892.  It wasn't until the Communist scare in the fifties that 'under God' was added.  In 1954.  If you're keeping track, that's 62 years without, 60 years with."

"Lower taxes don't generate more tax revenue.
This one is hard to say with a straight face.  Of course they don't...It is what George Bush (the good one) called 'voodoo economics.'  It has been disproved time and time again.  Because of course."

"Lincoln wasn't a real Republican.
They get mad about this one because they know it's true.  What we mean when we say Republican and what they meant back then are totally different things.  Lincoln's Republican party (Republican Classic?) believed in a strong federal government, they created the income tax, and thought that government should protect minorities from the tyrannies of the majority."

"Actually, it's Dr. Maddow.
Yeah, she has a PhD.  In politics.  From Oxford.  She's a Rhodes Scholar.  I think she knows what she's talking about."

"They all use executive orders.
...They all issued them.  In fact, George W. Bush issued almost 100 more than Obama has.  Literally every single president has issued them. (Except for William Henry Harrison, who died 32 days after taking office.)  So impeach them all, starting with George Washington."

"Obamacare is not Socialism.
Guys, I know you're being hyperbolic and all (aren't you?) but the Affordable Care Act is a market-based health care solution that was pretty much invented by the (super-conservative) Heritage Foundation, and implemented by comrade Mitt Romney.  I'm all for socialized medicine (sort of like we have socialized police and fire departments) but Obamacare isn't that.

"You guys are terrible at governing.
It's just a hunch I have.  Oh, wait.  It's empirical.  Using data from the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development Quality of Life Study, 24/7 Wall Street compiled a list of the ten states with the worst quality of life.  Guess how many were totally controlled by Republicans?  All of them.  Sorry, did I offend you?"

The way I see it, we could all enjoy 17 days of fun by sending one of these a day to our favorite Republicans. We could call it an "advanced interrogation technique" and wait to see how long it is  before they begin to crack under the pressure.